Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Boracay in the next 24 hrs....

"Every good tree bears good fruit"

That, I think is all about being parents. Wow. Do I want Polo to be a good person? Then, it is not just upto him. We have to good parents to him then. No excuses. I really pray I will be a good example to him later in his life. I want to show him how much I love his mother so he will really love his mother and learn how to respect women.
------------------------------------

I see their luxurious cars everyday and several times per day. Jaguar, MB, BMW, Audi, GM etc., Wow. Some of them use several cars in a week. Imagine that. The price of each maybe is equivalent to many years of salary for me. I just noticed. No explanation why I did. They earned it so they deserve it.

------------------------------------

Boracay time tomorrow. I guess the excitement wore off. One. We will be game masters. I'm KJ in nature. Two. It is like I want to rest with my family around. Three. Tight budget. Four. Ok, I have in mind a carefree Boracay. No structure or anything BUT we have to spend one serious day. Grrrrrrr.. My plan is made up. First day. No choice but spend time with the group. Second day. Wake up early to catch the morning sun. Roam around the beach for pictures. Have breakfast by myself. Go back to cottage. Snorkle. Go back to room. Roam around for pictures part 2. Lunch (by myself or join a group). Go back and sleep. Roam around again for pictures. Snorkel again. Wait for the sunset. Join the group for dinner. Spend time with the group. Then sleep. Day 3. Bahala na. :) Maybe spend more time in the bed. Loner! hahahahahaha.. Come on. This is a great opportunity to spend time for myself. That's how I unwind. Either bymyself or with my family. I hope its Friday already!

Monday, June 25, 2007

My sister is choosing Ateneo (so far)

" I will make your name great, so that you will be a blessing."

I hope Mariel will have a chance to pursue Ivy League Universities in US. She is the most intelligent and disciplined among us so I have high hopes for her and I believe she is cable of doing it. USD40,000/ year I think is their tuition so Mariel should aim high starting now. :) Pressure pressure.... But if not then there is noting wrong in going back to the Philippines and study in La Salle, Ateneo or UP. Exciting. If she will choose Ateneo then she will be the first Atenean in the Family. Both in the Agustin and Leonardo clans. I think. Most of us studied in DLSU or in UP. Go go go Mariel! We will support you in every possible way we can. I'm sure we will be your second parents here in the Philippines once you decided to study here. Just aim high and never let anyone or anything limit you. Be the one to find your limitation and not the other people. You can even be a full time scholar here if you wish to.

I guess the message of God today is for you. That's part of the first reading. God's promise to Abram (before he became Abraham). If you believe that God will give it you then it will happen. He always does fulfill His promises. Never failed. His ways will not be exactly how we want it to be but at the end the result will be the same. Fulfillment of His promise.


Amen

Friday, June 22, 2007

I am a Witness

"For where your treasure is, there also your heart be"

My treasure right now is my family. Josephine and Polo. I want to give them the best things in life. I don't just mean material possession and comfort but myself. The best that I could be for them. The best husband for Josephine and the best Dad for Polo.

I heard Polo singing this morning. Maybe a case of hangover from his 4th mo bday celebration last night. Ok. I interpreted it as singing. But it isn't his usual tone. There is continuity and a melody. That my friend is how my Polo is singing!

I am a witness. Yup, I saw it on my own two eyes how Polo managed to turn or roll over to his tummy. I captured him in our reliable camera. He did it. I am very proud of you my son. He can hold his bottle as well as he is learning to control his hands' movement (and feet too). Grabbing anything around him and goes straight to his mouth. hahahahahahahaha.

Last night, we celebrated his 4th mo bday. Really really really late. He slept at around 8:30pm and we were not yet ready then. He opened his eyes at 11:30pm already when everyone in the house has decided to call it a day. BUT. I really wanted to celebrate it as the little one is wide awake and so active. So, we opened his cake and had some pictures taking session. Hhahahahaha... our eyes were all sleepy and yeah our hairs were all messy. But we proceeded with the celebration and ate his blueberry cheesecake. Yummy! Polo decided to once again grab a portion of the cake during the camera session. hahahahahaha. Cant wait to eat. Two more months Mr. Little Agustin!

Thank God its Friday!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

June 21st-Polo's 4th month

"Your Father knows what you need before you ask Him"

Yahoooo! Today is Polo's 4th month birthday. I am not sure yet what we will be having but definetely there should be a cake with candles for the little one. How time flies?!! I am really having a great time being a new dad. Yeah, I know the road is still very very long as we've just started the journey. I am happy. One thing that I look forward to everyday is to carry Polo at night and lets him sleep on my arms. Priceless, precious moments! It doesn't happen everyday because Polo most of the time would fall as sleep while being nursed by Josephine. There are just a few nights that I have a chance to carry him. I do not mind the back aches during and after. Sometimes, I feel that he really wants me to carry him. He would stare at me and giving me a look that says, "Daddy, carry me please?" What is certain is that we will not carry Polo all of his life. I want to carry him now while it is physically possible. It is a great experience that I have not felt before. For a very obvious reason.

Last night, his grandpa took him as I was about to carry him. I missed one night... :(. I have to be generous though. Polo was already sleeping when Grandpa returned to our room. So, that's parents' lives. Work all day from Monday to Friday. Have a few hours of playing with our child and when he falls asleep, that's it for the day. We leave the house while he is sleeping. There are times that he is up but of course we still have to go. Weekends are the best part since we have him all by ourselves. No yaya, no grandma, no grandpa. Just us while the others can just look or ask permission before they can have our little Polo. But on regular days, Polo is all Lolo. :) That's good for Polo, diba?

Bless you my dear son! I love you.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Ineffective strategy

"Whoever sow bountifully will also reap bountifully"

No more. Nil. Nothing. Gone. Missing. Done. Over. .................

I do not know why I mentioned that. :) I am so damn overwhelmed with work. Really. I have yet to finish some things and then BOOM! New difficult tasks sprung out from nowhere. Then people will make follow ups. Some I can decide on. Some I can ignore. Some I have to face right away. Some are crazy. Some makes me a "Duh!" Of course I still manage to accomplish. But then Some are already a burden to me. To sum it up in one word, my state: INEFFECTIVE!

That's how I feel lately. It is lingering and it is fatal. Because it is totally against my whole set of beliefs! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!! I hate going home feeling I have not done anything significant! I hate it when I have made a list of things that I want to accomplish and yet sidelined the whole day by other matters. I told you. new things come everyday! Effect? I would find myself drifting in time. Surprised that it's time to go home. And we have to go home. It is like I am looking for an energy that has been depleted a long time ago. I am a car without gas. I can only honk my horn... honk honk honk honk honk.. nope. I am not broken. I have a good battery, you can still play music but I can not run. Give me some juice to drink! And FAST!!!! Otherwise, immobility will make me rusty and sad..... A sad car. Great but useless.

Self motivation. That's what is all about. Yeah. No one can push me or expect someone to do it for me. I have to do it myself. Get myself a gallon of gas. I have to move and depend on no one. It is all in the mind. That's where the juice will come from. Yeah. I have the heart but the mind isn't following. vrrrrooom.. vroooom... vroooooooomm... LET'S MOVE. MARVIN MOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!! That's my self shouting to my self! :)

Tuesday, June 19, 2007

My 1st Father's Day

"So be perfect just as your heavenly Father is perfect"

June 17.

Thanks to my dear son Polo, I now joined the worldwide club of fatherhood. So that was it like celebrating Father's day. I received a lot of SMS sending their "Happy Father's day" greetings. I woke with a long list on unread messanges from different parts of the world. (AND YES TIN, I RECEIVED YOUR MESSAGE : ) ). I just wasn't able to acknowledge all those who texted me because of various reasons.

Anyway, we went to mass at Sanctuario then we went straight to Serendra for dinner, dessert and others. We were like tourist taking pictures and amazed by our surroundings. Serendra isn't your ordinary malls. But I will discuss it here.

The whole family was complete and for me that made it special. Celebrating important occassion with important people in your life. Polo joined us sometimes but most of the time he was just sleeping hahahahahahaha... Good thing there were pictures that his eyes are wide open as if surprised by where we were then.

I can not post yet all the pictures here without Josephine's go signal. I just will pick maybe three pictures/

peekaboo

Yup. This is part of Serendra. We are in the Philippines

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Polo's Video

Friday, June 15, 2007

LE Broom: 4-0 sweep. Spurs. Most Boring NBA Finals ever!

"I myself will look after and tend my sheep"

Reassuring indeed. My Shepherd has taken it personally to look after me. I need to have daily positive outlook to battle mediocrity and an antidote to overwhelming but challenging work load. Fight!

To be effective, we always have to look at the positive side of things even if it is blurred or unwanted turn of events. Something good will come out of it. Always. But we will fail to see it unless we look under the stone. Surprise! I remember when I was still a child, one of the things I love doing was discovering what creatures I can find under the stones especially after the rain. Yeah, creepy worms and bugs. I was curious. Imagine if you look at a big stone. It seems nothing but underneath it lives a community. Amazing.

I was really a curious freak when I was a kid (that rhymes). There is a sense of excitement and adventure. *Sigh* I can't see Polo having that chance at all. 1. No more "dirt-backyard" or anything. Everything is cemented. Gone are the trees that we climb upto there crown. Or the animals we took care of. Pigs, goats, birds, fish, lots of dogs, cats, ducks, geese and what have you. Will he ever have a chance to catch "Salagubang", Tutubi, frogs, butterfly etc.,. Those were the good old days I have. Seen them. Touched them. Killed some of them. *Sigh*

Don't worry Polo. I have a plan. I will try as much as possible to introduce to the other inhabitants of this planet. But unlike me, I will teach you to respect life and appreciate these little creatures.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Another 15 min

"Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom"



The list is growing like vines spreading widely on the wall. That's how long my things to do. I am starting to get lost and unsure of where to start and end this. So ineffective so mediocre so disappointing!



I will be free. Just have to take it one day at a time. It will be over soon. First, the attitude must change. I must its role in my life. A challenge that I should be willing to face and overcome. Come on! Where is the winner in you? I hate losing but if I continue being like this I will not gain anything. Get up and kick some butts! Go go go. No more wondering just act and do it. No more thinking too much getting into what if, how, why?? just go one and pick the pace and move. Action is better than sitting.
------------------------------------------------

Polo is really adorable. I like it whenever he wakes up and upon seeing me or his mother he would give his best smile. There are times that he would cry after waking up but let him be (unless he is really hungry. even adults feel irritated when hungry. i should know) then slowly his mood would change and we stop cryin' there he will smile. Cute. Very expressive. A fine young baby.

Polo has outgrown a lot of his clothes but I think I mentioned before that we already bought replacements! Even his bouncing chair will have to say goodbye very soon. Even his crib. He sleep with us every night but I think his Lola let him sleep in his crib during the day. Some of the his stuff will be given away others will be used by *sigh* the second child. I am a second child but it is just the practical thing to do. I guess Polo's things are not just his. It just so happen that he is the first one to use them. Oh, he has some hand me down items also.

Polo's knees are definitely his mother's. Not mine. : ). I amazed on how he got some from me some from his mommy others from his lolo or lola. I guess we are like that. Like when I look at my pictures now, I can see my Daddy in me. Then I see myself with Polo. Weird.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Hear my thought!

" I have come not to abolish but to fulfill"

There. We now have a helper in the house. Good. Polo is indeed a good intercessor. And now he has his lola all by himself. oooops, not to fast. Maybe just 90% the other 10% is for Angel. : )

We are surviving without a yaya for Polo. We like and enjoy going out with Polo even without a yaya. Do we need one? Right now, no. I dont know. Everything seems to be natural whenever the three of us are outside, somewhere spending time. I'm starting to miss watching movies but I do not mind so far. Basta. So far we are enjoying our gimmicks without help.

What? Who me? Why? Ah, that's life sometimes I deny some responsibilities only to regret later on because of the consequences that stuck and followed me until the end. Then what? I have to face it bravely. Sample. My traffic ticket. I didn't agree with the charges given to me. I should have disputed it a long time ago and probably I would have a case. Today. Nah! Even I do not agree with my decision not act on it. Nine months after, here I am still have to fave that ticket. Grrrrrrr... ... and it is costly! grrrrrrr.... I hate this kind of decision when there is a financial impact that could have been avoided. La!

I am already planning for our first trip (local and by land only). So far, for wanting to have a changed, we are looking forward to have a restful vacation leave with Polo in Subic. WhiteRock is a candidate and so is Grande Island. Though, my mind and the safety conscious in me says that we might as well stay in White Rock because we have to ride a ferry to reach GI. Let's see.
Batangas and Cavite. No more places to go unless we discover something new.

Our biggest plan of course is to be able to go to US by next year. Let's wait and see.

Friday, June 08, 2007

In Fifteen Minutes v.3

"Sit at my right hand until I placed your enemies under your feet" Mk-12:35-37

--------------------------------

This sounds familiar. I had a problem then identifying my enemies but then Jesus made it obvious for me. It isn't "Who it is?" but it is more of "What it is or what are these? I agree. Yeah, I have a lot. Low Self perception at times, fears, worries, anger, uncertainties, doubts...so many that's why in the Gospel reading it say..."ENEMIES". Hoooray for Jesus is here. All I have to do is to sit at his right hand and He will crash my enemies. I'm sure being at His side doesn't necessarily mean that I will do nothing. David trusted God with everything. David knew he will be victorious because he is fighting with God. Stand up that's what He is saying to me. Fight and confront and look at them straight with divine confidence that God is on your side.

Time's up!

Thursday, June 07, 2007

I dreamt of Success

"Let the Heavens and all your creations praise You forever" - Tobit
--------------------------------

Emotional roller coaster again. Here I go again but it is in check though. :) In the series "Heroes" a character there advised Peter in a dream that all that really matter in this world is "Love".

Last night, I had a strange dream but it made me smile. I was riding with a friend in his new car and there was some sort of an emergeny that made him drive like crazy. I understand the situation and I was not afraid of the situation since I drive fast myself. (Though, it feels different if you are a passenger. maybe because I'm a control freak. :) ). It started raining but it didn't slow him down then we reached a valley and saw some of our friends (but I can't recognize them). He slowed down but I noticed that we were not on cemented grounds anymore. It was like a river bank and it was too late to stop him. Our car just lost control and its tires were sinking. We had to go down to push it out. So the car was stuck. My friends and I went then to the river and I realized that it wasn't really an emergency but something told me that we were there to have fun. I just didn't know what. Then I saw that there was a gushing of water coming towards us. It created a small wave. That was it??? My friends were laughing and playing with the water as waves came trying to push back. Weird. I was there so I just tried to play with them. I noticed that the river was getting deeper. My friends got tired and left I think to check the car that was stuck in the mud. I was alone when I saw from a far a huge wave of water coming toward us. I was there standing all by myself. I was not scared though but somehow I felt excited of thinking that I will ride this huge xxxth feet tall. It crossed my mind that I could die but I overwhelmed by the excitement and I guess it was too late to go into a higher ground. So, I faced it and when it came, I threw myself in the wave. I got worried when I tried swimming to go up because I might lose my breath. But then I was successful. Whew! I checked my friends and they were there with the cars and they didn't know what just had happened. Nobody knew. I just kept it to myself with a smile. :)

that's it. The dream was so vivid that it was surreal.

When I woke up. The dream mattered to me. Because I didn't run in that dream given the tsunami like wave. I courageously and bravely faced what could have been my end.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Mid year Madness

"The prayer of the two suppliants was heard in the glorious presence of the Almighty God"-Tobit

Yes, people six months have passed and just another six months and and and..it's Christmas time! :). 2007 your days are numbered. June. Time for my first Father's day and I'm excited about it because of course it would be my first time to join this club whose only requirement is that you have at least one child. Dogs not included. :) Whatelse? NBA Finals, Boracay in rainy June (i hope not), Chi-chi's bday tomorrow, our annual adjustment (maybe). Bonus... wiiiipeeeeee. Oh, Polo's 4th month bday. Wow! All in June Folks and there will be more but I'll keep it to myself for now. :)

I asked Polo to pray that her mother's milk supply to increase and be sufficient for his needs. I was worried that it would just one day stop. (of course I don't completely understand how it works etc., and the only way I know how to help Josephine is to pray for her and support her by not pestering her with any "doubt-full" questions. Praise God. Until now, Polo has enough milk. Miracle or God just telling me to trust the natural orders of the world.

I have a high cholest level same with uric acid and high in LDL, the bad cholesterol. I was paranoid that I have a cancer and so so many negative thoughts I have within me... sshoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo..... get away! In Jesus name, my mind and heart will be refreshed everymorning! Amen!

I guess I can say now that it is not easy being a parent. Imagine you take care of your children from the first day in the womb until s/he reaches adulthood or even more than that. You have to provide for his physical needs, emotional, spiritual well being 24/7. That's tough. I guess it would be more challenging in I lack something in those aspects I mentioned. There is a solution though! Proven and no one can dispute it. TRUST GOD. He will fill up what ever I do not have in me. I'm a believer. Why not? He is the Father of all. He knows what to do. I will not let my misery nor shortcomings guide my son or children but I will Jesus' sign to be my children guiding light as they grow up. Not me, but Jesus.

Polo: Different Moods

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Come. Celebrate life with us. Let's worship God!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting