My God

Worshipping God is the greatest experience in my life. When I shout and sing praises oblivious of the people I am with or where I am. For me, it is just God. Although, I am touched so much by the power of having to worship together with the community. It does break me into tears.

I often ask God to just let the moment be forever. I dont want it to end. (By the way, I feel like this whenever I attend a prayer meeting where we worship God.) I cry in tears knowing that God is just so close to me. He is with me.

That certain high can not be compared whenever I am having fun with my friends, if I accomplished something at work, spending time with my family, having money or material things. I know now how it feels to be with God. But I am aware that it just but a glimpse of how it is to be with God. Someday, by faith I claim that I will be with God.

How I wish that I could bring that feeling where ever I am. That leads me back to my mission in life which I have tried to define many long years ago when I was still in college. To acknowledge God's presence whereever I am, whatever circumstances I am in that I may live to honor God.

Difficult indeed.

There are so many instances in my life that I tend to handle it all. Pushing myself to find ways and means to the problems I need to face. By doing so, I feel the burden, the heaviness on my shoulder and as if Iam all by myself.

Then something magical happens. God will lead me back to Him. As soon as I realize that God is bigger than the all these burdens, my worries fade into the background. Yeah, I still have to face the challenges but I know that someone is looking after me. My life isn't defined by my activities, what people tell me, what I achieve or fail to do. My life is more than that.

God has time for me afterall. I do appreciate it, Father.

God's assurance is soothing like the morning breeze. Calming like the sound of the sea rushing to the shore. I keep it into my heart that I have a Father in heaven. It's not after I live this place but it can happen while I am still here.

My Freedom

I am free.
The other day God told me so.
What does it mean?
I know I am.
Yes, Marvin you do.

You are free.
The other day God told me so.
What does it mean?
Why did you say that to me again?
So that you may believe.

Am I Free?
The other day Gold told me so.
What does it mean?
I am confuse.
Then open your eyes so you may see

I am not Free.
That other day God told me so.
What does it mean?
I am living a life struggling to be free
Now you understand

Be free
The other day God told me so
I now know what it means
I have allowed the light to pass through me
Never surrender your freedom again

What I do not know

I do not know each specific step that I should follow in the projects that I'm handling

I do not know how to handle our finances

I do not know when to start facing our plan to go to US

I do not know what to do with our responsibilites as head of our ministry

I do not know if I will be promoted this year

I do not know if how long we will be with our parents

I do not know if we go to US, are we be with my parents forever

I do not know if I really want US vs New Zealand

I do not know if I stil want to stay here in SMART after being here for five (5) years

I do not know how to lose weight

I do not know my plans for my meetings in Bangkok

I do not know when we will have children

I do not know how to organize my different projects

I do not know how to manage my staff effectively

I do not know what our President and those rallyists are thinking

I do not know if I still following my mission in life

I do not know if I want to buy shoes

I do not know if I want to reply ro the newspapers' editorial section

I do not know if the Lakers will make it to the play off

I do not know if Kris and James will really end up together

I do not know if I still want to watch American Idol

I do not know if I still want to share my burdens to others

I do not know whether to continue playing badminton

I do not know what else I should be doing

I do not know how to handle my tons of work

I do not know if my staff can still follow where we want to go this year

I do not know how to end this..........................