Desperate thought

Do you think it is easy? I don't. To ask when you totally have nothing. To approach when there's no one to turn to. I have to set aside my own ego and pride. I compromised my dignity but what can I do. I can only look at directly at your eyes and never have to bow down. That's all I have now. I have nothing to boast. I have nothing to show. I have nothing but what have be fallen me. The tide hasn't turned yet. No need to panick because it would only waste my energy. I have to move fast to salvage what I can save. Help me and I will do anything you want me too. Just help me and I don't care what it takes to repay the goodness you will do for me. I cry out at night when there is no one around because I don't want anyone to see how weak I am. They need me to be stronag. They need me to stand and to weather the storm all by myself while protecting them. I wonder how long I can hold on.

Someone is holding hands, the others my head, while there are some who are clinging on my feet. What will I do? I am in agony not because of my personal difficulties but because so many depend on me. Should I ignore their cries for help? Must I be deaf and blind by what has surrounded me?

to be continued